I blame the royal navy
For everything that’s’ happened to me
The ship on her maiden voyage
Left my housing estate in in a wreckage

I blame the royal navy
For everything that has happened to me
I never rose above the rank
Of a common sailor on the gang plank

Yes and you think it glorious
To topple the statue of queen victorious
Well I’ve got news for you
I’ve been doing it since I Was two

I blame the royal navy
For everything that has happened to me
When the admiral stepped ashore
He followed me through my door

I’m sure it Was he/him
Who docked my ticket
Hit my Wicket
Removed my picket
Painted my Wall a bottle green
Added sea salt to my dream
Expelled me from the football team
And exchanged my pirate hook for a claw

I blame the royal navy
For everything that has happened to me
I don’t know why
They’ve probably never even heard of me
But there it goes