He explicitly forecast sun

He explicitly forecast sun
But here
It is snowing again
It slipped by all his sensors
Down the byways and the country lanes

He beamed a smile as if the sun
Had got him
So glad to give the solar good news

But over night the drain pipes
And out comes rainclouds
Drizzle and ooze

The cats turn back from the doorways
The pigeons sit on heated rooves
The weatherman walks to work through a snowdrift
With frozen frogs and newts in his shoes

Cat-a-wailing Katie

Kat a wailing Katie
Is going to California
To enter the competition
For world’s best cater-wailer

She got on a ship at Portsmouth
She sailed the Atlantic
She got a freight train out of Boston
And got off in San Jose

Just in time
Thousands of caterwailing cats
Had tried and failed
To ring the caterwailing bell

She took to the stage
She shook her fur
She opened her throat
A wailing began to stir

Like the sound of giant tin cans banging
Like a wolf holing at the moon
Only ten times louder
The universe shuddered at the tune

The needles vibrated on the cactus
The sand vibrated on the shore
The president somewhere in the white house
Jackhammered across the floor

Well done Katy come lately
You won the best prize of all
The world cup trophy for caterwailing
But please don’t do it anymore


As a present
I would send everyone
A flamingo

I’ve imagined
What it would be like
To have a flamingo
Sitting on your sofa
Watching TV

And it’s fine

I glimpsed
An African lake
Bereft of flamingoes

But I’m sure
That you would
Tale care of them

The fabulous
Pink flamingo
Would be good
In your interior designs

As for food
Take them down
To the seafood stall
And let them eat
All that they want

Cat and dog

The cat and its cat food

I put the beef with jelly
Into the cats dish
And it starts crying

I would look at it
Beef with jelly
But why is it crying

I never expected this
I should take it back to Tesco
This meat is crying

Tesco says
Send it to our psychologist
To be analyzed

“Hi Doc, Why is this meat crying?”
“Can’t you see it’s sad,
It misses its true love!”

I send it to a lab
They regrow it in a test tube
Then it’s sent home complete and free

The beef that cried
The beef that cried for its true love
Was saved

The cat is crying
The cat is angry
Where’s my beef in jelly it cries?

Problems arise
Word gets around
Beef with jelly is crying in every cat dish

The song of the cat

You don’t have to be So truthful
You don’t have to be So wise
All I need to know Is in you
And its shining brightly In your eyes

You don’t need to be so honest
You don’t need to be so clear
All I need to know is in you
Wiping away all my fear

Long are the avenues of sainthood
Wide are the fields of sacrifice
But never have I lost all the darkness
Until I saw the light in your eyes

You don’t have to be So forthright
You don’t have to be So bold
All I need to do Is be with you
All I need is To hold your hand

The dog

Chained up outside
I escape from my collar

I run into the house
I look around
I see the flowers

She gets upset
She gets frantic
“Here boy”

I run
Under the table
I start chewing

I look at her
With sad eyes
As sad as I can be

I paw at the tag
From the bouquet
I howl

Written inside
The new dog has written
Toujours 🧡

Song of the dog

I left you on the hill so far away
But your tornado spirit was still
Dotted lines of words flew like birds across the map
The grappling hooks of light were chill

You shake like a tambourine
You rattle like a moneybox
You roll every one you meet
You sit down in everybody’s seat

I was walking down along my tightrope
Your voice rang out thru the wire
I was covered by a swamp weed of solutions
Nothing I could find could fix my tyre

You shake like a tambourine
You rattle like a moneybox
You roll every one you meet
You sit down in everybody’s seat

I looked at my plate it was empty
I read my epitaph to make sure
I’m so lost within your territory
I’m homeless all along your shore

You shake like a tambourine
You rattle like a moneybox
You roll every one you meet
You sit down in everybody’s seat 

Some of this post is probably pathetic, so apologies.

Sweet Disney

Do you
Miss me

Sitting in the third row
Of the cinema
With an ice cream
And a bag of popcorn

Do you miss me?
As you carry me
Into a fantasy world

Between me
And the screen
A highway
Of a dream

Where children
And blubber
At a cartoon

Sweet Disney
Do you
Miss me
Do you
Have my name
In your
Book of life
You have!
That’s nice

I never knew
That life
Be like hat
A nursery rhyme
And a
Fairy tale

Sweet Disney
Do you
Miss me
Not as half
As I
Miss you

Dreams do discover

Do discover
The white queen
The lover
In the honeycomb
Of your mind

That stand
On your tongue
And echo
In your lung
And revel
In a mind
Without time

Dreams do discover
As secret
As secret can be
Hiding in storms
And bright sunny morns
They wait
In chains
To be free

Into your half-lit world
That stamps on them
As soon as
They emerge

Song: Nuclear Meltdown Blues

She’s a nuclear reactor and she’s way out of control
She’s a nuclear reactor and she’s way out of control
She’s going into meltdown and her housing will explode

She needs my sprinkler system just to control her heat
She needs my sprinkler system just to control her heat
My pink button controls will cool her from her head to her feet

Oh no, she’s exploded, her blue cloud blows everywhere
Oh no, she’s exploded, her blue cloud blows everywhere
Parts of her reactor now have given me glowing hair

Oh I need your energy, strip me down and plug me in
Oh I need your energy, strip me down and plug me in
Let me have your nuclear power babe and make my nuclear atoms spin

Listen to the meltdown, that uranium core is hard
Listen to that meltdown, that uranium core is hard
My lead walls are shattered, her radio-activity’s dropped my guard

Now she needs a physics scientist to examine what I’ve done
Now she’ll need a physics scientist to examine what I’ve done
That uranium rod is everywhere it’s so dangerous, its no fun

Angry Ian

How angry is Ian

So you awoke in the morning
Not knowing how angry Ian is

Love -for Ian – is like
Little beads of water in a frying pan
As the gasses lash
Ian poked his head in the pan

Angry Ian got burnt
For a few pearls of water
And then he proceeded
to the slaughter

How angry Ian really is
An angry Ian goes basket-balling
Through the green snakes of summer
Machine gunning with his little fingers
The invading hang gliders from Hit-land

Angry Ian foams and bubbles in brine
Sets fire to his shoes and runs thru litter
Smashing the traffic beacons down
And stripping the traffic wardens of their uniforms
That’s how angry Ian really is

Angry Ian says

Protest thru rock                 Protest in full moon
Protest thru stone               Protest in eclipse
Protest thru flesh                Protest with eyes
Protest thru bone                Protest with lips

Protest with femurs            Protest with fingers
Protest with thighs              Protest with toes
Protest with laughs             Protest with ears
Protest with cries                Protest with your nose

………………….Walk up to the flag
………………….With a flag of your own
………………….Walk up to the border
………………….With a passport of stone

………Protest all alone
………Protest all alone

…………………………………I’ve been a protester
…………………………………Since the age of one
…………………………………I started protesting
…………………………………With my nappy on

Mother didn’t listen
Bother didn’t like
Father took it further
Scholl broke my mind

I protested in silence
Like the boy who’d gone bad
I protested in silence
Until I went mad
When I was five

Angry Ian and Simmering Sue

Angry Ian and simmering Sue
Got their dog porky
And went to the zoo

When asked for their money
They said that’s not nice
How can anyone
Afford such a price

Then up rolled a Rover
And out came a prince
He got in free
With hardly a wince

Then the ticket office man
Turned and said scram

To angry Ian and simmering Sue
And not forgetting
Their dog Porky too

So they hiked round the back
And climbed over the fence
And made monkey faces
At the keeper and the prince

And let out a skunk
And the scorpion too
And the black widow spider
That ran thru the zoo

Then angry Ian
And simmering sue
Got their dog Porky
And went home two by two

Angry Ian

Angry Ian
Tried to run away
Down to the red light
To stop and to stay

He met lots of ladies
And was safely employed
Taking them breakfast
Of spinach and pork pies

The police inspector
Caught the runaway
He clapped him in irons
Like a lost stray

He would not give his name
He trod on their feet
And down Gypsy Lane
He ran fast and fleet

There he fell in love
With a gypsy twin
She was dark and beautiful
Hungry and thin

The coppers they found him
And tore them apart
And angry Ian
Had a broken heart

They pushed him in a van
And took him away
When they stopped for a cuppa
The coppers turned grey

Angry Ian picked the lock
And ran off down the way
Without shoes or socks
For a year and a day

Then he joined the circus
As a fire eater
After a performance,
he drank lots of cold beer

Social services went mad
The cops and his parents
Surrounded the circus
And taking their bearance

Charged right in
And arrested him
There’d be no getting away now
For angry Ian

They locked him inside
A high-security prison
And that’s the last word
We have of angry Ian